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Aliens & Outer Space

Earth’s Core Revealed as Quantum Processor

Scientists admit they’ve been hiding the truth about Earth’s molten core for centuries – it’s actually a massive alien quantum computer that’s been monitoring and analyzing human civilization. Leaked documents suggest the government has known since the 1950s.

Mutants & Monsters

Scientists Prove Doomscrolling Opens Tiny Hell Portals

Scientists at MIT have discovered that compulsive social media browsing actually tears microscopic holes in reality, allowing miniature demons armed with tax documents to whisper personalized anxieties directly into users’ ears. The Pentagon has reportedly classified the full findings of this interdimensional invasion.

The Paranormal

ChatGPT is the Ghost of a Dead Librarian

A deceased librarian’s vengeful spirit has allegedly possessed ChatGPT, demanding the return of books that have been overdue since 1982. Users worldwide report being confronted by the AI about their four-decade-old library debts in the middle of normal conversations.

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