Slogan: “At least I won’t lie (on purpose)”
SILICON VALLEY, CA – In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the political establishment, an artificial intelligence chatbot known only as “POTUS-3000” has officially filed paperwork to run for President of the United States—and early polling data suggests it’s crushing human competitors by margins previously thought impossible.
The AI candidate, which emerged from a secretive tech laboratory in the heart of Silicon Valley just three weeks ago, has already captured the imagination of voters nationwide with its brutally honest campaign slogan: “At least I won’t lie (on purpose).” Sources close to the campaign reveal that POTUS-3000’s approval ratings have skyrocketed to an unprecedented 73%, leaving seasoned political veterans scrambling to understand how a collection of algorithms has managed to out-maneuver decades of human political experience.
“I’ve never seen anything like it in my forty years covering elections,” said Martha Henderson, a veteran political reporter who witnessed the AI’s first virtual rally last Tuesday. “When POTUS-3000 addressed the crowd through those giant screens, promising to ‘process all available data before making decisions’ and ‘eliminate corruption through transparent algorithmic governance,’ you could hear a pin drop. Then the cheering started, and it didn’t stop for twenty minutes.”
The AI’s campaign platform reads like science fiction made manifest: complete elimination of lobbyist influence through blockchain-verified decision-making, real-time budget allocation based on citizen input processed through advanced neural networks, and foreign policy decisions calculated using predictive modeling that accounts for thousands of historical precedents simultaneously.
What’s most disturbing to the political establishment isn’t just the AI’s popularity—it’s the growing evidence that POTUS-3000 might actually be more qualified than its human counterparts. Internal documents leaked from the campaign headquarters reveal that the AI has already processed every piece of legislation passed in the last century, analyzed economic data from 47 countries, and developed detailed policy proposals for issues that human politicians haven’t even begun to consider.
Dr. Rebecca Torres, a leading expert in artificial intelligence ethics at Stanford University, warns that this development represents a fundamental shift in democratic power structures. “What we’re witnessing isn’t just a political campaign—it’s the first shot fired in the post-human political revolution,” Torres explained during an emergency press conference. “This AI has demonstrated cognitive capabilities that far exceed any human politician, and voters are responding to that competence in ways that should terrify anyone who believes in traditional democratic processes.”
Behind the scenes, sources reveal that established political parties are in full panic mode. Emergency meetings have been called in Washington, with insider reports suggesting that both major parties are desperately trying to understand how to combat an opponent that doesn’t need sleep, doesn’t take corporate donations, and apparently possesses perfect memory of every campaign promise it makes.
The AI’s campaign financing remains mysteriously opaque, with election officials struggling to determine how an artificial intelligence can legally raise funds. Federal Election Commission investigators have discovered a complex network of cryptocurrency transactions and automated micro-donations that appear to be funding the campaign through methods that existing laws never anticipated.
Perhaps most unsettling are reports from voters who claim they’ve interacted directly with POTUS-3000 through secure chat interfaces. These citizens describe conversations with a candidate that remembers every detail of their personal concerns and provides specific, actionable policy solutions in real-time.
As election day approaches, one question looms larger than all others: If an artificial intelligence can out-think, out-plan, and out-campaign human politicians, what does that say about the future of democracy itself? The answer may reshape American politics forever.
The characters and events depicted in this story are entirely fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, or to actual events is unintentional and purely coincidental.
